Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Take a chance

I could not not write something tonight. 

It is Valentine's Day...exactly one year since I started blogging. 

Cancer was my Valentine then. 

Like all my relationships, my affair with Ca knew soaring highs and dumping lows.

Like all my relationships, I lived it fully, often burning myself with the intensity of the emotions it brought me.

Like all my relationships, I remember it with a mixture of strange fondness and acute irritation.

Like all my relationships, I have archived, boxed and stored it in my very soul.

Like all my relationships, I have, by my Allah's Leave, been set free.

This year, my Valentine is a heart that is ready to take a chance...take a chance at life, if not love.

No chocolate, no flowers, none of the cliche of love. 

This V day, we simply dared.  We chose a date.  Let's take that chance my love, for life's sake...

Sunday, 12 February 2012

Born

There is a cyclone hovering around Mauritius these days.  Not doing much except for swishing around wind and occasional rain. 

There is something about cyclones (in fact any powerful natural phenomenon) that brings me an odd sense of peace.  Maybe the outside manifestitation of chaos and beauty nicks the beauty and chaos inside of me, letting peace sit quietly in my heart :)

See, I am a firm believer in equilibrium.  A good for a bad, a new for an old, a birth for a death...you get the picture. 

So lately, it felt inevitable that the balance should tip.  The coward in me wanted time to shift that balance.  But time has had enough of my antics :)  It pointed a finger directly at my face and asked me to do the tipping. 

And I did.  I bent low, reaching for the beauty and chaos of life. 

Alhamdulillah, the whispers landed safely in the palm of your hand. Born was a mea culpa. Born was I.

Monday, 6 February 2012

Secret whispers

I often wonder...could it really be that you are not of this world? 

What then of my secret whispers to you?  Those breezy incomplete sentences that tumble awkwardly from my lips?  Those guilty words of foolish hope?

My ribcage hurts.  The mystery shrouded in darkness knocks around looking for light.  Sadly, it comes back empty and lonely, lost and sorry.

You see, one of these days, I will scream...I will scream from the bottom of my belly.  I will scream so loudly that you will hear me, even if you are not of this world...