Sunday, 19 June 2011

Heightened emotions

I measure the greatness of my day by the things I have managed to accomplish at the end of it.  Because every single day I wake up with about 4 or 5 things to do on top of the usual routine (yes, there is always pen and paper in my brain and I write a few lists and doodle plenty!!!). 

I set mysellf simple tasks like cleaning the bathroom, reading The Book, calling XYZ, calling on ABC, taking my solumag, sitting with the parents, contributing my two cents to obligations here and there, etc etc.

Simple enough.  Except that on some days I have no energy and need to postpone a few things. Or else I am so turned off by smells that approaching the bathroom or kitchen or any form of pill/medecine is a battle.  But on other days, I get everything done and even earn a little bonus in the form of adrenaline.

Today, Alhamdulillah, was one of the good days.  And I got my bonus.  It came in the form of a little chat with a gentleman in a dingy clammy restaurant.  A little reminder that moments change and that there really is no need to attach any label to the change.  To simply leave the good and bad tags out. 

I really like this perspective.  It is simple and true. 

This thing with cancer is really funny...because suddenly every little big thing is magnified tenfold, every emotion is heightened, every feeling is accentuated.  Beauty is more beautiful.  Pain is more painful. 

Maybe this is what life is really about.  Living each single moment with absolute intensity, complete ferocity.

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